Baby Three

Two days before Easter, we found out we would be expecting our third child! To be honest, it was in the wake of an extremely stressful time. Our little Hannah had fallen a couple days prior at Target and had to get four stitches in her forehead. I was already feeling overwhelmed and incapable of taking care of two very active little ones - that my immediate thought when I found out I was pregnant again was, How am I going to do this?!

But then I remembered my sweet boy, Micah, coming into the kitchen earlier that month, looking at me inquisitively and asking, "Mommy, how do we get another baby in your tummy?" I smiled at the thought of him wanting another little sibling, without knowing that his daddy and I had been "working" on it for a few months already. But so far, there were only negative tests. And I wasn't sure how much hope I should hold out for considering my history with endometriosis. So I kneeled down next to him and quietly said, "Well, you could pray and ask God to give us a baby." With a defeated voice he said plainly, "But I don't think God will hear me." I lifted his chin and stared straight into his eyes, determined to defeat both his fears and mine. "That's not true, I prayed to God to give me a baby and He gave me you and your sister. God will definitely hear your prayer." Then the sweetest thing I've ever seen happened - he folded his little knuckles, bowed his head right there in the kitchen and began praying, "God would You please give mommy a baby in her tummy? Amen."

Approximately 3 weeks later, that prayer was answered. 

It was this sweet reminder that put a smile across my face and lifted the weight of the insecurities and doubts that I would be able to take care of another child. Sure, I'm weak. And weary. And often feel like I can't handle it all on my own. But the Lord, gave us this child. He has always renewed my strength, in one way or another, and by His grace we continue to survive.

I have felt His strength while taking care of two preschoolers and simultaneously battling nausea and digestion issues. I felt His peace when I had to make a scary trip to the ER last week to be catheterized. This hasn't been the easiest pregnancy so far. But again and again, I'm amazed at the miracle taking place inside me and I know the Lord has His hand on it all.

One exciting perk to this pregnancy - I get to share the experience! My little sister is expecting her first child, a baby girl, in October! I am so excited for her and looking forward to having close cousins as playmates! It's been fun sharing this little secret with my sister for the last few months. And, though I'm not quite sure how she did it, she was able to keep her pregnancy under wraps for 20 weeks and just had a big gender reveal party last week to surprise her friends! I'm not sure whether they were more excited about the gender or the pregnancy, but I'm glad the secret is finally out! I was having a harder time keeping her pregnancy a secret than my own, ha!

Not that I would have ever been able to hide this bump for long. Third babies don't like to hide.

Josh and I had a fun getaway last week for our anniversary in the mountains. It was my first time being away from the kids since they were born, and as nervous as I was anticipating it to be - it was definitely a much needed and relaxing time! We may look all serene and serious in these photos, but it was quite the comedy trying to capture them! We set up the self-timer on my camera - and I was hopping over rocks and hills (in heels!) to try and make it back next to him in 10 seconds. It was worth it though. These views were breathtaking and priceless. I am so glad we were able to spend this time together... just the three of us. And I guess I still technically can't say I've spent a night away from my babies, seeing as how I'm currently carrying another one. :)  

10 years with My Valentine

I will never forget Valentine's Day 2006.

It was my first Valentine's date with my future husband. The last man that would ever get to call me his "Valentine." And the first man that I ever really wanted to. :)

Josh and I were in college and had only been dating for a couple months, things were still "fresh" and "new." We went out to dinner together and then to see a movie. 

I wrote him a poem. With pictures included. Ok, basically, I made him a scrapbook. 

He gave me... well, actually, this is where my memory fails me. I have absolutely NO idea what he gave me for our first Valentine's Day! I'm 99% sure it was candy of some kind. Chocolate, probably. But beyond that - no clue. (Sorry my love! Just proof that you mean more to me than any gift!) 

But I do remember that I was in love. Before I ever said the words and before I let myself admit it, I really was

I will also never forget Valentine's Day 2008. 

It was the day Josh asked me to be his wife and I gave the easiest "yes!" I could have ever said. 

Prayer and patience make you certain of some things and saying "yes" to marrying my husband was one of those. 

I love that as soon as Josh picked me up for our date that Valentine's Day, he took me straight to the beach to propose! He didn't wait until after dinner, or sunset or when the "moon" or "mood" was just right. He proposed around 5pm and we enjoyed the rest of the evening basking in the anticipation of our future together. 

There are some things not worth putting off, and we were married only four months later.

Tomorrow is Valentine's Day 2016.

And in honor of this special day and ONE DECADE spent with the man I love, I thought I would jot down just a few things that I don't want to forget about my husband.

This may sound obvious, but I never want to forget just how much love I have for him. A love that transcends feelings, although the feelings are strong and bring me to tears. A love that speaks 10 years of memories, good and bad, exciting and painful - memories that we can't remember and the ones that we will never forget

I want to remember the way my hand fits perfectly in his (and has from day one). And weirdly enough, this has always made me feel safe and at home with him.

I want to remember how he still makes me laugh at the same old jokes. And how I'm mostly laughing because he never stops telling them. 

I want to remember how beautiful it is to look at our children and see both of us in them. How gracious God has been to entrust us with two incredible lives to nurture and raise. How we almost thought we may never experience biological children, and how okay we would have been with that. But God. 

And most importantly, I never want to forget how God's grace is woven into every aspect of our marriage. We are two imperfect people who have surrendered ourselves to the need of a perfect Savior. I could never imagine marriage without Jesus, just as I could never imagine a life without Josh. And until death do us part, I'm so glad I don't have to.

Happy Valentine's Day, my love.
Here's to decades more!