Before I knew them, I longed for them. These children of mine. I longed for someone to call me, "Mommy" and for little hands to hold. I longed to see them smile when they woke up and to sing them to sleep at night. I longed for a chance to love someone so unconditionally that it hurts.
And when the scary thought of never being able to have children crossed my mind, I began to pray for a passion and heart for adopting one day. Because I knew without a doubt, being a mom was part of my purpose in life. However it happened, it would happen.
I have to remind myself of this when the days are tough... and long. When I sit down for two seconds, only to hear the shrill cry of my newborn or, "Mommy! Mommy!" from my one-and-half year old who decided not to nap that day. And when I am cleaning crayon markings off the walls and white dining room chairs that I spent a week sanding, priming and painting (Lysol wipes get the job done though, I must say!) I have to remind myself that I prayed for this season to come. I prayed and God answered. Not because He knew I was ready, but because He was.
We can make our plans, but the lord determines our steps. Proverbs 16:9