Last night as I went to bed, I closed my eyes and had a vision of how today would go. I would wake up, pull Micah from his crib and snuggle with him for a few minutes before jumping in the shower to get ready for my 9am bible study. The babysitter would come at 8:30 and I would leave her with a clean, fed, happy baby who would be ready for his nap in an hour.
Then I would drive to bible study, enjoy a refreshing time with some wonderful ladies and make a pit stop by the doctor's office to pick up my blood test referral. I would come home in time to meet the floor guy who is putting tile in our kitchen and laundry room, and relieve the baby sitter from her duties...
And then I woke up this morning.
And it seemed like everything that could go wrong did. Ever have one of those days?
I didn't wake up to my alarm this morning, or even a soft cry on the baby monitor, instead I woke up a half hour late to a screaming, crying baby. And I was so "out-of-it" that I had a pillow fight (meaning I kept my head on the pillow the whole time) with my husband about who would go get Micah.
I won. But really, we both lost.
As Josh was in the room changing Micah, I hear him call for me on the monitor, "Cassidy, please come in here... there's pee everywhere." As I fought to open my eyes and stumble out of the bed, I mumbled loud enough for him to hear about how dramatic he sounded about pee and that it can't be that bad...
When I got in the room, Micah proceeded to pee all over me. (Insert dramatic sigh)
Josh started the bath and by this time it was 8:15. There was no way I'd be showered before the babysitter arrived.
After Micah was bathed, I got him dressed and changed the sheets in his bed (which also had pee all over them). Doorbell rings, I grab my robe and answer it. Thankfully, she humored me and called me gorgeous (she's a keeper).
I finally jump in the shower to get ready. Now my thought is, there is no way I'm making the bible study on time.
I hurried and finished with 5 minutes to spare. I'll be a few minutes late, but things are looking up.
Then I get in the car, pull out into the street (the only street to get out of our neighborhood I might add) and get stuck behind a school bus. It took 10 minutes to drive 2 miles.
I have nothing else to do, so I start singing. "Oh what a beautiful morning, oh what a beautiful day, I've got a beautiful feeling, everything's going my way!"
I couldn't help but laugh when I look down and my gas tank is empty.
We all have those days when the way we envisioned it going is nowhere close to reality. Sometimes it's silly examples like the one I gave, and sometimes it's your wedding day. Whatever it is, and whenever it happens, the feeling that comes over us can probably be summed up in one word: discontent.
It's hard to be content with life when it doesn't go as planned. And it's not like we can just get rid of our "plans." Oh, how I wish it was that easy sometimes. But our society thrives on a schedule. We have schedules for learning - we call it school - schedules for eating, schedules for exercising, and we even schedule in a time for spiritual growth every Sunday.
Not that schedules are a bad thing, because without them a lot of us would not accomplish these basic, necessary habits for our lives. But when we live for a schedule instead of with a schedule, I think that is when we crumble when it falls apart.
Here is a passage that calms my discontent heart when it comes to plans:
Look here, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we are going to a certain town and will stay there a year. We will do business there and make a profit.” How do you know what your life will be like tomorrow? Your life is like the morning fog—it’s here a little while, then it’s gone. What you ought to say is, “If the Lord wants us to, we will live and do this or that.” Otherwise you are boasting about your own plans, and all such boasting is evil. James 4:13-16
I made it to my bible study this morning twenty minutes late, but I still received the blessing of fellowship and truth spoken with the women there. If I lived for the schedule, I probably would have just told them I wasn't going to make it when I knew I wouldn't be there right on time. But living with the schedule, allows me to experience the freedom and grace that comes with not being able to handle every problem that hinders my "perfect plans."
I probably wouldn't try to use that as an excuse to your boss for why you're late for work everyday, but you get the picture.
Plans are wise and should be made, but our hearts should be so dependent on the Lord for when the time comes and they're, inevitably, broken.
This post is part of a series I’m writing for the month of October entitled “31 Days of Being Content.” See all other posts in this series by clicking here. Or enter your email address in the sidebar on the right to subscribe to this blog and receive posts straight to your inbox!