Seasons in Marriage


I'm spending the week in Greenville, SC with family while Josh is 11 miles away at X-Fuge camp with 87 students and adult leaders.

Yes... I'm on vacation while he is on mission! :)

I think a lot about how our marriage dynamic has changed since having a baby. Two years ago, I would have been at the camp too. Serving out in the heat, sharing the gospel with children, watching our students grow in their faith, praying for and encouraging them as they shared stories of hurt, pain and struggle.

But as much as I loved that time of my life, I wouldn't trade places with my pre-baby self for anything.

I am still passionate about ministry and serving others, but it looks differently these days. The friend struggling through infertility, the stay-at-home mom whose husband just lost his job, the friend whose baby was born pre-mature, with a life-threatening illness, or who never made it into the world.

These are the situations that I find myself on my knees more often for these days. Because these stories hit close to home. Motherhood is my season.

Sometimes these days, I feel a disconnect from Josh when he comes home from camp or other trips where he spent a large amount of time with students. Aside from the caffeine high that he's usually reeling from, there's the excitement of students committing their lives to Christ for the first time and those that have been called into ministry! A lot of them have questions and there's a lot of texting/phone calls that take place after these trips. Before baby, I was right beside him. Sometimes even offering my own advice while he was talking on the phone.

Now, I'm changing a diaper for the third time in an hour. Or giving Micah a bath. Or feeding him. Or playing with him on the floor. Or rocking him to sleep.

I can see how this transition could cause some marriages to struggle. Especially when one is working and the other is staying home. You may feel like you live on two different planets.

I think one thing that has helped Josh and I, other than our dependence on Jesus, is talking about everything. We make sure that Micah is in bed by 7:30-8pm and we spend the rest of the night together. It's like date night every night! There are a couple days in the week when we can't always make this happen, but it has been a lifesaver for me to have this time with Josh.

It's when we get together to talk, laugh, and pray that I realize we aren't living on two different planets. God is using us both for specific purposes. He's taken our past and present seasons of life and just multiplied our area of ministry here on Earth.

This has given me a different outlook on those late night phone calls or texts from students. Instead of looking at them as distractions, I realize how blessed I am to be married to a man who is not only a great husband and father, but he's doing his best with the area of influence the Lord has given him.

And with the Lord's help, I'm doing the best with mine.