One of the oldest songs I've written that is going to be included on my upcoming EP is "Beauty." I wrote this song during my freshman year in college. This time of my life was filled with answers to my questions, doubts and insecurities that had built up over the years. I cried out to God...What makes me beautiful to someone? Will any man ever see me for who I truly am and still call me beautiful? If need be, am I content being single - just me and the Lord - for the rest of my life?...God abounded with answers to these questions. And my heart poured out into this song. My favorite line (and one that I still repeat to myself time and time again) is, "The time will come when beauty fades, and the only thing that matters is the heart that remains." I am so glad the Lord has brought me to the point in my life, where I find my beauty first and foremost in Him. But, God knows it hasn't always been this way.
Here is the story behind "Beauty"...
I gave up "dating" when I turned 16. Yeah I know, that's when most people just begin to date. haha. As any typical girl growing up, my life consisted of meaningless school-girl crushes each year. I can remember having my very first "boyfriend" in the 3rd grade! Of course nothing happened, it was just pretend fun. Then middle school came and I was one of those girls that drew "I ♥ Johnny" on my hand and wiped it off before I got home so my mom wouldn't see.
When I was a sophomore in high school...I finally got asked on a real date. Not just to prom or something. An actual - he picked me up and took me out - date. The date turned into a year-long relationship that was full of warning signs from the very beginning. But that was the farthest thing on my mind. The clouds began to form over my eyes - and although, I was a Christian - following Christ was no longer first priority. God knew it...and He wasn't pleased.
One night I was invited to sing at a worship service in a local church nearby. I went, my family went and so did my boy-toy at the time. After I had finished singing, a lady I had never met before in my life got up to the piano and began to lead the entire congregation in a beautiful worship medley. In the middle of one of her songs, she stopped singing...glanced over at me and began to speak, "The Lord wants you to know..that He has given you a beautiful gift (singing) that you need to use for His glory. But...(and this is where God really got ahold of me)...there is a relationship in your life that you need to CUT OFF! It is hindering you from what He has planned."
I wrestled with God that night. I could have chosen to ignore this "prophesy from the Lord" and called it foolishness, voodoo-talk or whatever...but I knew without a shadow of a doubt, that this woman was speaking truth. Truth that I hadn't wanted to hear from anyone else. And I'm so glad God chose to rescue me. He didn't have to. He could have let me wander and handed me over to my own sinful desires. But I'm His child...and He wasn't going to let me go that easy.
I gave up dating with ease after that. And until I met my husband, my date nights consisted of spending quality time with my heavenly Father, writing songs, encouraging and being encouraged by my brothers and sisters in the faith. Life was good. And now...even better, I'm married to a man who loves the Lord more than he loves me! And I could never be happier.
I pray that hearing this song will bless you. And I pray that now, reading the story behind it, you will be blessed even more. Remember Who makes you beautiful.
Click here to listen: [audio:http://cassidyrobinson.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/08/01-Beauty.mp3|titles=Beauty] Gazing into the mirror Can’t compare to the picture I hold in my hand A picture in my hand
Glancing inside my closet Is a witness of the small deposit I can afford to spend I have nothing left to spend
So how can I impress? If I can’t wear the dress Or have the face That can take a breath away
Where is my beauty? Where does it lie, where does it hide? Who can see it? If it’s coming from inside, then why can’t I, feel beautiful?
Beauty is vain So I’ve been told But how come the world Only wants what’s beautiful?
I’ve been trying to possess The inner beauty that is best And pray that in the end That would pass the test
Turn my heart to seek thine eyes And captivate my wandering mind And purify my life Lord, purify my life
Oh, the time will come When beauty fades And the only thing that matters Is the heart that remains